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Proportionally, women curtail the number of partners more than men do from their 20s to 30s, probably reflecting the younger average age at marriage for women. Only 16% of men in their 20s have gone without sex in the last year, and that number stays steady in the 30s.This belies the notion that a large majority of males has zero access to sex. I’ve come across this claim repeatedly, though the application of the 80/20 rule varies.Sometimes it’s stated that 20% of the men get 80% of the sex, which is actually a very different claim. Women in their 20s, when they are at their peak of fertility and beauty?Even a slight imbalance – say 45% of the men getting 55% of the women, would wreak havoc in the SMP, explaining great frustration on the part of many men. If the 80/20 Rule holds up, then the vast majority of women can be assumed to be getting what they want – short-term sexual liaisons when they’re at their physical peak.However, it also means that they’re acting against their own best interests if marriage is their long-term goal.

It’s a rather grim tale, and one that I continue to find compelling. What is not clear is how severe this disequilibrium is.

In the monogamous marriage system of the past, the majority of men and women found mates and got married.

In that system, singles knew roughly where they were ranked in overall attractiveness and married a mate of roughly equal rank as soon as they could, usually by their early 20’s.

The Pareto Principle (also known as the 80/20 Rule) states that, for many events, roughly 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes. Juran suggested the principle and named it after Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto, who observed in 1906 that 80% of the land in Italy was owned by 20% of the population; he developed the principle by observing that 20% of the pea pods in his garden contained 80% of the peas.

It is a common rule of thumb in business; e.g., “80% of your sales come from 20% of your clients.” The Pareto Principle is an observation, not a law of nature, but it holds roughly true in many areas of life.

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By having many relationships, many sex partners and even multiple wives in serially monogamous fashion, the most attractive men can consume the prime reproductive years of multiple women…When some men consume more than their share of women, there will necessarily be other men, lower on the attractiveness hierarchy, who will have no suitable women available for marriage at all.

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